It was at 1 p.m and very cold. The wind blew quite strong, but i decided to join Rhema group to climb up Mt.Sinai by foot. Deep inside my heart, i believe that this journey to climb up Mt.Sinai will be remarkable.
Stars look so beautiful that night since it was very dark at the foot of Mt.Sinai. There was no light, and i have to turn on my flash light to see only my path. After I turned on my flash light, i followed a Biduin guide – local people of Mt.Sinai – to climb Mt.Sinai. It was not easy to walk since there were a lot of stones and dust. Suddenly i realized that it is indeed a mountain, not just a pathwalk.
Luckily, i decided to continue the journey. 5 minutes, 15 minutes, 1 hour and i started to ask to the Biduin guide named Mousa, ” where is exactly our final destination?” He simply answered ” you cannot see it, but you will get there for sure”. I directed my flash light up, but i could not see anything. Just dark. Each time i did not put the flash light for the path right in front of me, i barely fell down.
The “smell” of camels sparked along with the cold wind that night. Some of group members had decided to go back because they were too tired. Then, I started to question my self, whether i really want to continue the climbing. It was not late for me to turn down again anyway, like everyone did. But, again, i believed that this journey is worthed. I took a very deep breath, and continued the journey.
After passing a camel station and ate some Pop Mie ( yes, it is a real Indonesian Pop Mie was sold at mt.Sinai), i climbed up again. Then, i had a break in the last station before reaching the top. The paths right after were harder than before, as well as the wind, it blew stronger than before. I convinced myself that i have to finish this, and climbed up again.
Finally, i reached the top together with some people from my group, including my 45 years aunty ! She was amazing ! I was thrilled with the ambience there, and felt so grateful that i can accomplish it. Then, i took a quite time to pray in front of a small chapel at the top of Mt.Sinai. I couldn’t ask anything in my prayer that night, i was so amazed and all i could do simply give thanks to God for His faithfulness.
I opened my eyes after prayed, and again was so amazed by the scenery of Mt.Sinai. Then, i realized that it was very very high, i could not see the foot of the mountain anymore.
When i was walking down from Mt.Sinai, yes i walked again !, i pondered the journey, and God revealed the meaning of my journey. He said,
“My daughter, life is like a journey to climb up Mt.Sinai.
You will never dare to climb this mountain in the daylight, since when you look into the height of the mountain, your mind will shut down your courage. That’s why you started climb in midnight, when it was dark.
Same as your life, if I revealed all My plans in your life now in details, you will never dare to move because you think it is impossible.
So, stop questioning, and keep walking in your life.
All you need is focusing on a path right in front of you, because you will fall down when you do not focus.
You do not need to worry about the direction, for I will never leave you nor forsake you. If a Biduin guide who is a stranger guided you safety into the top, will I not do more to guide you? If you believe to walk with a Biduin, why don’t you want to believe in Me?
I was trembled and blessed at the same time. I always ask God about my future career, my future family, etc,etc,..to make sure that i can plan and control everything. Suddenly, i realized that i should not do that again. God knows what he is doing. I do not need to know the exact final destination, all i need to know that He is with me, guide me to the right direction. And, i have to focus on what is in front of me right now. Doing my best as a legal consultant, and enjoy the journey !