There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother. -Proverbs 18:24 NLT
Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends. -John 15:13 NASB
Last night, our cell group had an after-party. Yeah, I mean, after most of the CG members went home, some of us -who were still craving for more- stayed and continued talking about mentoring and discipleship.
Well, I don’t really know the theological theories behind discipleship, but I was just so happy that I have a mentor. My current mentor, I met her more than a year ago, is probably one of the best I have ever had. And I thank God repeatedly for her.
We met through what I believe as a ‘divine appointment’, the first time I joined my cell group. I was in a desperate need of a mentor, someone to teach me more about God, and there she was, standing right in front of me, that very moment. That time, we could feel it flowing in our hearts; God has knitted our souls, just like Jonathan and David in 1 Samuel 18:1-3. Something greater has bound us, and we won’t be able to escape each other.
She was not an easy mentor. There were times when I felt that I won’t survive her mentoring process. Her style was not ‘soft’ and ‘easy’. She threw hard words for me to digest, and she wouldn’t soften her methods though I have begged for it. I still remember, I went home one day and said to my Dad that I thought she was too hard, and I was not sure she’s right for me. My Dad’s comment was as simple as: “It’s hard too find a good friend”. But it got my attention. It had me linger a little while, just to find out what is exactly the will of the Lord. Because I am sure that once He showed someone to me, He has a plan.
So I stayed. When she scolded me, I stayed. When she told me to do something I was not comfortable of doing, I tried really hard to obey. I kept trying to digest her words and trusting her because I know, she said what she said and she did what she did because she loves me.
Once I can grasp God’s love in her, and her love to God, I began to enjoy the process. I began to understand that God has sent her to build me, not to entertain me with nice words. I started to want more and more times to learn from her, and God has allowed me to do so.
And now, after one and half year spending most of my days with her, she is one of my best-est friends, a sister I never had, a loving mentor, and even sometimes a very annoying mommy. She has shown me how to lead, how to follow, how to destroy, how to build, how to hate the bad without losing love to the good, how to stand strong through trials, how to keep believing in my God whatever circumstances I’m in, and more than anything, how to trust God that I have His everlasting love, true acceptance, and that I will always have Him as my ever-present Savior, no matter what I did, no matter how bad I was.
She has opened my eyes to a lot of things in life. She has opened my eyes so I can see more of God, not her. This is the first and foremost fact you have to see in a mentor. Does he reflect God through his life? Or he’s just trying to show you some church-like achievements? Does he put God at the center of his life? Is he falling in love with God more than you? What shines through his face? God, or his works? Is he living a Godly life, or a Christian-packaged life? Make sure, before you make someone your mentor.
So I encourage you, brothers and sisters, find yourself someone to build you, to teach you about Jesus, and to open your eyes to the truth and only to the truth. It might not feel so comfortable at first, because the truth does hurt, but that truth will also set you free. Find someone who wants to take you into his/ her life and let you observe, learn. Someone who is delighted in praying for you and your family. Pray so you can find one Godly brother or sister, because it would certainly help you find your ways in life.
God has found me one, the best there is, may He do the same to you.
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